Trauma or Bereavement
You or your child may have experienced a trauma, bereavement or something that has had a large impact on their life. You may have noticed an immediate change or a gradual change. A lot of times when a big change, especially a negative one, happens in a child’s life it can help to talk about it together. It’s a time to learn resilience and come through the other side. In some cases a traditional counselor or therapist could be your best option, in other’s you may need that something different.
We can help with a behavioral issue, such as a child isolating themselves, fighting and becoming more aggressive or if you or a family member is losing confidence. We assist in making that goal happen. A few examples are when a child is becoming verbally and physically aggressive and needs to reestablish ways to control emotion and anger, an accident that requires motivation to continue the physiotherapy or maybe you are indoors not enjoying things again and struggling to get outside.
It is true that time is a great healer, life will continue around us and it’s up to us how much we engage with it. Sometimes we need a little time, however it is scary how quickly a little time turns into a longer time and we get stuck in that rut.
Depending on your unique circumstances we can help. We start discussion but expand from talking therapies such as CBT into the physical world too. Arranging and accompanying to a sports club/boot camp, gym, engaging in a new activity or supporting through CAHMS, talking with school or actually doing the physiotherapy with you.
Max’s mother died recently, he was working with a counselor and doing things still but would cry every night. I would cry with him, he would crawl in my bed and we would just try to sleep. School got him a counselor and he would go but it was really tough, but as the weeks went by he went back to school and I went back to work. It wasn’t living, it was surviving, I tried to do my best for him but just felt I was failing. Max didn’t want to leave me to do anything and school was all he did outside the house. We got Parenting Commandos round, Max didn’t want to speak to anyone else. Parenting Commandos were fine and told him he could if he wanted to, instead they turned up on the same time every Tuesday to speak to me. I lost my wife as well as his mother. It was good to realise that. I had my parents around me but it was good to have someone different. After a couple of weeks Max started to come down and chat, they spoke together, not about his mum but about what max liked doing, what he maybe wanted to do in the future, stuff I couldn’t even think about but he said he wanted to be sailor and a footballer. So Parenting Commandos set up a football match and a boating lesson, they explained it maybe a temporary focus but it’s all about getting Max involved with other stuff. Parenting Commandos looked at football clubs, Paddle boarding lessons and a few other bits. It’s never going to be normal but Max met some other kids in paddle boarding and goes without me.
Anthony (Edinburgh)
